A: He was getting too Sassy.

What did the bioinformatician say when he found out his team stopped using version control?

A: Y’all better Git!

Why did the computational biologist stay home from work?

A: He had a code!

Why was the bioinformatician's paper was rejected?

A: Journal thought it seemed scripted.

How can you tell that a Bioinformatics is working?

A: You can hear him Grunting!

Why bioinformatician always silence?

A: Because bioinformatician calmly whisper, “SSH”

Why was the bioinformatician always so sleepy?

A: He/She wasn’t given any Java.

Why did the program/software hanged?

A: Because genome float.

Why was the class upset that its parent died?

A: Because it wouldn’t be getting the inheritance!

Why did bioinformatician always works on the command line?

A: Because they don't want to scare you with huge amount of data!

Why did the bioinformatician attend the gay pride parade?

A: They supported polymorphism.

Why did bioinformatician prefer awk, PerlOneliner?

A: Because even computer can't handle to load the data.

Why don’t bioinformatician get along with others?

A: They’re too MEAN.

Why computational biologist are cool?

A: Because they are scripted!!

Why they talk $ unzip; strip; touch; finger; grep; mount; fsck; more; yes; fsck; fsck; umount; clean; sleep;

A: Ah, Ohhh, dude, these are *NIX commands

Did they really hack genome?

A: Yes, I guess so.

 http://metapred2cs.ibers.aber.ac.uk/

Address of the bookmark: https://github.com/martinjvickers/MetaPred2CS

More at

https://www.isas.de/files/redaktion/jobs/2021/18.60.1_Postdoc_deNBI_06_21_AS.pdf

https://www.isas.de/en/news/062021-post-doctoral-position-scientist-mfd-in-bioinformatics

A full-time post-doctoral position for a bioinformatician with experience in managing and analyzing NGS data is available in the Laboratory of Molecular Cardiology at Policlinico San Donato-IRCCS, Milan, Italy. For lab publications, see: http://scholar.google.it/citations?user=wAPKO9wAAAAJ&hl=it&oi=ao

https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Fabio_Martelli

The goal of the project is investigating the regulation and functional role of non coding RNAs in tissue response to hypoxia and ischemia.

We are looking for a candidate that is going to interact with biologists and bioinformaticians to manage and analyze NGS data (mostly RNA-seq) and microarray data.

The successful candidate must have a minimum of 3 years experience in dealing with NGS data, a good command of English and written communication and at least 2 relevant publications as first author in peer reviewed international journals. The candidate is expected to interact with a small international group and to be able also to work independently. Knowledge of programming is a definitive plus, as well as a good statistical background and/or wet molecular biology skills.

Salary is proportional to experience and to the publication record (up to 38 000euro/year before taxes and retirement contribution i.e. IRPEF and INPS).

Please, send your CV by e-mail to Fabio Martelli:

fabio.martelli@grupposandonato.it

Location: Laboratory of Molecular Cardiology at Policlinico San Donato-IRCCS, Milan, Italy.
Link: https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Fabio_Martelli
Contact person: Fabio Martelli
Contact email: fabio.martelli@grupposandonato.it

Project Title : "Targeting TAL effector mediated susceptibility for durable and broad-spectrum resistance to bacterial blight in Rice"

No. of Post : 01

Qualification : MSc in any subject under Life Science or Bioinformatics/ B.Tech in Bioinformatics + 1 yr experience

Stipend : Rs. 14,000/-

How to apply

Interested candidates are requested to send their applications explaining their interest in the position with an updated CV to Dr. Ginny Antony, Assistant Professor, Department of Plant Science, School of Biological Sciences, Central University of Kerala, Padannakkad, Kasaragod, Kerala - 671 314 email: ginnycuk2013@gmail.com on or before 20th December, 2015.

More at http://cukerala.ac.in/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=1022:applications-invited-for-the-post-of-jrf-department-of-plant-science&catid=106&Itemid=593&lang=en

The main features are, it supports many standard file formats such as GFF, BED, GTF, FASTA, VCF, BAM and it can be integrated with other browsers or tools for analysis of genome.

We are hiring a post-doctoral fellow for the development of innovative bioinformatics methods to explore metabolic networks and enzyme families. These methods will be based on protein family analysis and graph approaches combining genomic and metabolic contexts.

For more details, please see this link : http://goo.gl/tHQOqk

Qualifications:
PhD degree in bioinformatics or computational biology
- Previous experience in network or protein family analysis
- Programming skills (C/C++, Python, Java) and in common biostatistical analyses
- Team player, innovative and creative thinking, good oral and written communication skills

24 months, Post Doctoral position
Start: from March 2016
Place: CEA, Genoscope UMR8030, LABGeM (Laboratory of Bioinformatics Analyses for Genomics and Metabolism), Evry, France
Contact: David Vallenet, vallenet@genoscope.cns.fr
Publications: https://scholar.google.com/citations?user=rJNPLSAAAAAJ
Remuneration per month: from 2,850 €

Interested candidates should send their CV, statement of research interests, and contact information of at least 2 references to David Vallenet (vallenet@genoscope.cns.fr).

The MicroScope platform is available at this URL:

https://www.genoscope.cns.fr/agc/microscope

Address of the bookmark: http://microscope.readthedocs.org/en/latest/index.html

It was first developed to transfer annotations between different genome assembly versions. However, it can also transfer annotations between strains and even different species, like Plasmodium chabaudi onto P. berghei, between different Leishmania species or Salmonella enterica onto other Salmonella serotypes. RATT is able to transfer any entries present on a reference sequence, such as the systematic id or an annotator's notes; such information would be lost in a de novo annotation.

More at http://ratt.sourceforge.net/

Address of the bookmark: http://ratt.sourceforge.net/

• Automatically improve draft assemblies
• Find variation among strains, including large event detection

Pilon requires as input a FASTA file of the genome along with one or more BAM files of reads aligned to the input FASTA file. Pilon uses read alignment analysis to identify inconsistencies between the input genome and the evidence in the reads. It then attempts to make improvements to the input genome, including:

• Single base differences
• Small indels
• Larger indel or block substitution events
• Gap filling
• Identification of local misassemblies, including optional opening of new gaps

More at https://github.com/broadinstitute/pilon/wiki

Address of the bookmark: https://github.com/broadinstitute/pilon/wiki