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	<title><![CDATA[BOL: Related items]]></title>
	<link>https://bioinformaticsonline.com/related/9207?offset=0</link>
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	<guid isPermaLink="true">https://bioinformaticsonline.com/fun/view/23959/bioinformatics-jokes</guid>
	<pubDate>Fri, 21 Aug 2015 01:26:54 -0500</pubDate>
	<link>https://bioinformaticsonline.com/fun/view/23959/bioinformatics-jokes</link>
	<title><![CDATA[Bioinformatics Jokes !!]]></title>
	<description><![CDATA[<p>Why was the Bioinformatics fired from his job?</p><p>A: He was getting too Sassy.</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>What did the bioinformatician say when he found out his team stopped using version control?</p><p>A: Y&rsquo;all better Git!</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>Why did the computational biologist stay home from work?</p><p>A: He had a code!</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>Why was the bioinformatician's paper was rejected?</p><p>A: Journal thought it seemed scripted.</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>How can you tell that a Bioinformatics is working?</p><p>A: You can hear him Grunting!</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>Why bioinformatician always silence?</p><p>A: Because bioinformatician calmly whisper, &ldquo;SSH&rdquo;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>Why was the bioinformatician always so sleepy?</p><p>A: He/She wasn&rsquo;t given any Java.</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>Why did the program/software hanged?</p><p>A: Because genome float.</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>Why was the class upset that its parent died?</p><p>A: Because it wouldn&rsquo;t be getting the inheritance!</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>Why did bioinformatician always works on the command line?</p><p>A: Because they don't want to scare you with huge amount of data!</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>Why did the bioinformatician attend the gay pride parade?</p><p>A: They supported polymorphism.</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>Why did bioinformatician prefer awk, PerlOneliner?</p><p>A: Because even computer can't handle to load the data.</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>Why don&rsquo;t bioinformatician get along with others?</p><p>A: They&rsquo;re too MEAN.</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>Why computational biologist are cool?</p><p>A: Because they are scripted!!</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>Why they talk $ unzip; strip; touch; finger; grep; mount; fsck; more; yes; fsck; fsck; umount; clean; sleep;</p><p>A: Ah, Ohhh, dude, these are *NIX commands</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>Did they really hack genome?</p><p>A: Yes, I guess so.</p>]]></description>
	<dc:creator>Jitendra Prajapati</dc:creator>
</item>
<item>
	<guid isPermaLink="true">https://bioinformaticsonline.com/file/view/7032/computer-experts-in-biotechnology-laboratory</guid>
	<pubDate>Wed, 04 Dec 2013 02:11:43 -0600</pubDate>
	<link>https://bioinformaticsonline.com/file/view/7032/computer-experts-in-biotechnology-laboratory</link>
	<title><![CDATA[Computer experts in biotechnology laboratory]]></title>
	<description><![CDATA[<p>Only bioinformatician can understand that <strong>multiplication</strong> and <strong>division</strong> are different but same thing :)</p><p><span>Disclaimer:</span>&nbsp;This cartoon is solely designed to create humour and fun, not to offend any computer experts.</p>]]></description>
	<dc:creator>Jit</dc:creator>
	<enclosure url="https://bioinformaticsonline.com/file/download/7032" length="35726" type="image/gif" />
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	<guid isPermaLink="true">https://bioinformaticsonline.com/fun/view/8509/the-best-bioinformatics-computational-biology-quotes</guid>
	<pubDate>Wed, 26 Feb 2014 17:50:59 -0600</pubDate>
	<link>https://bioinformaticsonline.com/fun/view/8509/the-best-bioinformatics-computational-biology-quotes</link>
	<title><![CDATA[The Best Bioinformatics / Computational Biology Quotes]]></title>
	<description><![CDATA[<p><img src="http://bioinformaticsonline.com/mod//photo/hahaha.png" style="border: 0; border: 0px;" alt="image"></p><p>Bioinformatician are not anti-social; We are just genome friendly.</p><p>Bioinformatician would love to change the biological world, but they won't give us the genetic code :P</p><p>If at first you don't succeed; call it version 1.0</p><p>The glass is neither half-full nor half-empty: it's actually have several genomes.</p><p>I'm BioGeek.</p><p>Fedup with LIPS, try God script.</p><p>Idiot, Go ahead, make my data!</p><p>Thank god, my genome just compiled.</p><p>Error message: "Out of space on genome drive:"</p><p>Shut up mobile elements, or i'll flush you out.</p><p>Never underestimate the internet bandwidth, u gotta incomplete.</p><p>Applied fuzzy logic to understand God's logic?</p><p>Warning! Overflow, delete chromosome !</p><p>Be nice to the BioGeek, for all you know they might be the next curator!</p><p>Beware of computational biologist they screw genes and protein.</p><p>Warning! Your genome is full of garbage, delete it !</p><p>Bad or missing mouse genome. Spank the cat? (Y/N)</p><p>Genome make very fast, very accurate mistakes.</p><p>Let's BLAST it.</p><p>Some genome never has transposons. It just develops random features.</p><p>Go watch CINEMA and have BLAST.</p>]]></description>
	<dc:creator>Jit</dc:creator>
</item>
<item>
	<guid isPermaLink="true">https://bioinformaticsonline.com/fun/view/2383/golden-rules-of-bioinformatics</guid>
	<pubDate>Wed, 14 Aug 2013 21:11:33 -0500</pubDate>
	<link>https://bioinformaticsonline.com/fun/view/2383/golden-rules-of-bioinformatics</link>
	<title><![CDATA[Golden Rules of Bioinformatics]]></title>
	<description><![CDATA[<ol>
<li>All constant are variable.</li>
<li>Copy and paste is a genetic error.</li>
<li>First solve the problem, then write the code.</li>
<li>No matter what goes wrong, it will probably look right.</li>
<li>Any simple problem can be insoluble if enough metting are held to discuss it. :P</li>
<li>Stastics is a systematic method of comming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.</li>
<li>Bug is a undocumented feature in programming languages.</li>
<li>Good biological programmer goes on summer holiday with raincoat. [because see 1]</li>
<li>Thanks god Google know python is not a python and multiplication and division are the same thing.</li>
<li>Don' be clever, complex biology will trick you.</li>
</ol>]]></description>
	<dc:creator>Jitendra Narayan</dc:creator>
</item>
<item>
	<guid isPermaLink="true">https://bioinformaticsonline.com/bookmarks/view/10415/bioinformatician-stuck-in-wet-lab</guid>
	<pubDate>Tue, 06 May 2014 12:46:56 -0500</pubDate>
	<link>https://bioinformaticsonline.com/bookmarks/view/10415/bioinformatician-stuck-in-wet-lab</link>
	<title><![CDATA[Bioinformatician stuck in wet-lab]]></title>
	<description><![CDATA[<p>This guide is aimed at pet bioinformaticians, and is meant to guide them towards better career development.</p>
<p><strong>1. Make friends with local bioinformatics groups</strong><br> <strong>2. Talk to your computing group</strong><br> <strong>3. Obtain clear expectations</strong><br> <strong>4. Rewrite your job description</strong><br> <strong>5. Papers</strong><br> <strong>6. Attend bioinformatics meetings</strong><br> <strong>7. Try first, ask later</strong></p><p>Address of the bookmark: <a href="http://biomickwatson.wordpress.com/2013/04/23/a-guide-for-the-lonely-bioinformatician/" rel="nofollow">http://biomickwatson.wordpress.com/2013/04/23/a-guide-for-the-lonely-bioinformatician/</a></p>]]></description>
	<dc:creator>Rahul Agarwal</dc:creator>
</item>
<item>
	<guid isPermaLink="true">https://bioinformaticsonline.com/fun/view/4194/what-a-bioinformatician-always-dream-for</guid>
	<pubDate>Tue, 03 Sep 2013 15:31:17 -0500</pubDate>
	<link>https://bioinformaticsonline.com/fun/view/4194/what-a-bioinformatician-always-dream-for</link>
	<title><![CDATA[What a bioinformatician always dream for ???]]></title>
	<description><![CDATA[<ol style="color: #000000; background-color: #ffffff;">
<li>Well established bioinformatics labs with SGI(silicon graphics interface)</li>
<li>License of all commercial softwares.</li>
<li>Complete, and&nbsp;fully assembled genome of the girl :P</li>
<li>A girl/boy with lesser E-values and higher compatibility score.</li>
<li>Horoscope Match should be significant (not less that 18).</li>
<li>Laptops with broadband connections.</li>
<li>Licence to almost all genomics and proteomics servers.</li>
<li>All eBooks of bioinformatics.</li>
<li>Ready passport and Study visa.</li>
</ol>]]></description>
	<dc:creator>Jit</dc:creator>
</item>
<item>
	<guid isPermaLink="true">https://bioinformaticsonline.com/file/view/2534/bioinformatician-needs-ten-heads</guid>
	<pubDate>Sat, 17 Aug 2013 10:30:45 -0500</pubDate>
	<link>https://bioinformaticsonline.com/file/view/2534/bioinformatician-needs-ten-heads</link>
	<title><![CDATA[Bioinformatician needs ten heads !!!]]></title>
	<description><![CDATA[<p>Bioinformatics demands more and ... lots more knowledge. In this case Ravan, a mythological character from the Ramayan, can only be a real bioinformatician. :) :P</p>]]></description>
	<dc:creator>Jitendra Narayan</dc:creator>
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	<guid isPermaLink="true">https://bioinformaticsonline.com/file/view/4482/bioinformatics-definitions-and-applications</guid>
	<pubDate>Thu, 12 Sep 2013 15:04:36 -0500</pubDate>
	<link>https://bioinformaticsonline.com/file/view/4482/bioinformatics-definitions-and-applications</link>
	<title><![CDATA[Bioinformatics definitions and applications !!!]]></title>
	<description><![CDATA[<p>There have been long discussion amongst several specialized/expert educator regarding bioinformatics arena, but everyone explain bioinformatics with their own view. I tried to explain it with a cartoon. Hope you all will like it.</p>]]></description>
	<dc:creator>Jit</dc:creator>
	<enclosure url="https://bioinformaticsonline.com/file/download/4482" length="49464" type="image/gif" />
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<item>
	<guid isPermaLink="true">https://bioinformaticsonline.com/file/view/5719/bioinformatician-kidnaped</guid>
	<pubDate>Thu, 17 Oct 2013 05:10:23 -0500</pubDate>
	<link>https://bioinformaticsonline.com/file/view/5719/bioinformatician-kidnaped</link>
	<title><![CDATA[Bioinformatician kidnaped !!!]]></title>
	<description><![CDATA[<p>Some fish kidnaped a bioinformatician for their genome analysis.</p>]]></description>
	<dc:creator>Rahul Nayak</dc:creator>
	<enclosure url="https://bioinformaticsonline.com/file/download/5719" length="12701" type="image/gif" />
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<item>
	<guid isPermaLink="true">https://bioinformaticsonline.com/file/view/2741/bioinformatician-dreams</guid>
	<pubDate>Wed, 21 Aug 2013 10:50:45 -0500</pubDate>
	<link>https://bioinformaticsonline.com/file/view/2741/bioinformatician-dreams</link>
	<title><![CDATA[Bioinformatician Dreams]]></title>
	<description><![CDATA[<p>Bioinformatician life is interconnected, they always dream for a powerful server, little more space on server as they are generating lots of data per run, dream to publish results in good impact journals, meetings reminders :) and research analysis off course!!!&nbsp;</p>]]></description>
	<dc:creator>Jitendra Narayan</dc:creator>
	<enclosure url="https://bioinformaticsonline.com/file/download/2741" length="557537" type="image/png" />
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